How to stop that damn door from creaking!

There are few things worse than a creaking door. Well, maybe the person who forgot to put the doorstop back in place or was too lazy to close the door behind them.

I digress.

The point of this here article is to try and solve your creaking door issues. Time to say "enough is enough" and put those horror film flashbacks to bed.

So, here are four household items you can use to solve the murder mystery, uhm... I mean creaking door in your house.

THERE'S SOMETHING STANDING BEHIND YOU! Just kidding...

- Beauty Soap

After making yourself look like a million bucks in the shower, take the wet bar of soap and rub it on the hinges. Not only will your hinges smell delicious, but they will also stop creaking. Try and remove all the little hairs from your husband before doing so - as that is just gross.

- Butter

After making yourself a delicious sandwich, crammed with cheese, lettuce, chicken, mayo, and tomato, take some melted butter and rub it onto the hinge. Use a paintbrush to apply the melted butter, otherwise you will be left with sticky fingers... and the ants we tried so hard to get rid of last week might return!

- Cooking oil

After you have fried some delicious chips and got over the guilt of eating carbs, take some normal cooking oil and either spray it onto the hinge or use a paintbrush to apply it.

- Petroleum jelly

I have used petroleum jelly in the past to protect my nipples from chafing during exercise. Yes, that was far too much of an overshare. Anyway, rub petroleum jelly onto the hinge that is causing you nightmares and that should do the trick. You will also have extra petroleum jelly to protect your nipples going forward. My pleasure.

Good luck, folks.